Controversial Matters!

Sandra on expectations:
"People have their lists of what they want in their partner, and three-quarters of them are superficial. If life doesn't give you what you want, it'll present you with what you need and you don't realize it. That need is far greater and more profound than the little list thing."

For many many years I did not like Sandra bullock. All I really knew of her was her movies but I refused to watch any of them. I became a fan in 2000 when she made Miss Congeniality. I realized not only do I now like her acting (I think the type of roles she played had something to do with it) but I seemed to like her and have every since then. I like her tomboy ways because tomboyish or not she is still beautiful and still feminine. I like her attitude and I like her movies.

When I first found out she was getting married I was elated for her and then I found out to who because I was unaware of this character Jesse James, what he does or his reality show because biking is not my thing. In any case I was not impressed and wondered what the he** she saw in him. Granted, even though he cleans up well a lot of it for me was superficial but I finally decided regardless of what we think “john q public” if he makes her happy that is all that counts!

Even though this article is about Sandra let me just mention that I am a huge Apprentice fan and when I saw Jesse James on the show I was even less impressed with him because I saw him as somewhat arrogant and a know it all with too high an opinion of himself…but look at him now.

Sandra married Jesse James on July 16, 2005. Sandra took on a huge role (step mom) when she married Jesse but she rose to the occasion and for a long time I guess they were pretty happy, I know Sandra was. She was so proud of this man, her husband and took every chance to include him in whatever was going on even crediting him when she received her Oscar for “The Blind Side” and right after that he broke her heart. Sandra is the epitome of (u)the last one to know and it hurt so much she withdrew from society for a bit and she made a decision (same one I would have made) to get a divorce. At the beginning I labored under the impression that Jesse James had an indiscretion but it turns out this was an ongoing thing. This was too much even for me!!!

Do I feel bad for Jesse James, no, no more than I felt for President Clinton or Tiger Woods. You can’t claim to love someone so much and they be the love of your life and you can’t keep it in your pants. That’s not love but you wanting to have your cake and eat it too and you only become remorseful once you’re found out and you know the public thinks you’re a sh*thheel. I can only say that the fact that Jesse James had already been married twice should have been a clue for Sandra. If nothing else she should have at least tried to find out why the previous divorces. If infidelity was involved she should have run for the hills because Sandra had only planned to marry once (forever) and as far as I am concerned not only did he wreck something really beautiful and meaningful for Sandra but she can never recover that dream.

News Updates:

4/28/2010: Saying she's sad and scared, Sandra Bullock confirms she "filed legal papers seeking to end her marriage." She also revealed that in January she adopted a newborn baby, Louis Bardo Bullock, and that she will raise Louis on her own.

Ps: bottom line even with the “heil Hitler photo” (a Hitler stance doesn’t a racist make, neither does a derogatory remark about your race) I don’t think Jesse James is prejudice, a racist or is a monster. He’s just a very very very small man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I first want to say that I am so happy that “Lee DeWyze is our newest American Idol Winner! I felt Lee was the most deserving and the most humble and he has a great voice so I voted as much as I could and I asked all my Myspace friends that are into idol to vote for him as well. I can’t wait for his first album!

Now with that said I want to say that I think American Idol has become one of the cheesiest reality shows on television. I didn’t particularly like Paula Abdul but she was an Idol fixture so you cannot begin to imagine the dismay I felt when the network brought in Kara Dioguardi under the guise of being an additional judge when it was all done with the design to replace Paula.

It does not surprise me that Simon is leaving now. The show ain’t what it used to be. The format quality is down, the judge’s comments are repetitive and the talent is lacking. The one thing that was a constant was Simon Cowells honesty and genuine desire to give constructive criticism. It might not have always sounded constructive but I believe that he cared about what he was doing and if you ever took a good look at the contestants when they were getting judge critiques they would listen to everyone else, thank them and smile in all the right places and then when it became Simon’s turn they looked at him expectantly and when it was positive their face looked like a ray of sunshine. Simon’s opinion was the one that really mattered. Simon cannot be replaced!!!!

Now I have been watching idol for 7 out of the 10 years. I quit on the show ½ way through the year “David Cook” won but other than that I have been a loyal watcher and I will probably be there when next season starts because I’m very loyal to my regular shows but unless something changes and makes this show better rather than worse I’m not so sure that I will hang in there too much longer. Let me know what you think.

The evening was fun for all and the final results weren’t exactly the outcome I was hoping for because Evan Lysacek was my choice to win but I was okay with Nicole winning because she was my 2nd choice! Nicole is an amazing dancer and she deserved this win. I loved seeing Kate Gosselin. She was looking especially pretty and it was nice to see her have fun with her dance. Now the real highlight of my evening besides the crowning of the Season 10 winner was watching Neicy Nash, jiggly parts and all and Pam Anderson do their sexy dances. See ya next season…the burning question is do you think they’ll let Fergie dance on the show next season?

Last night was another wonderful night of dancing. Evan Lysacek (my choice to win that mirror ball trophy) dazzled me with his Foxtrot and blew me away with his Paso Doble. My second choice to win Nicole Scherzinger had a really good Argentine Tango and Cha Cha Cha. I’ve found that more seasons than not since I’ve been watching the show my 2nd choice wins over my 1st.

I think that the semi-finals should be Erin, Nicole and Evan and that the finals should be Evan and Nicole. However it stacks up I’m looking forward to the freestyle round next week. Last season the freestyle round was disappointing so I’m hoping for something spectacular this season.

Amir Khan World (Official Website

British boxer ”Amir Khan” made his US debut this past Saturday May 15, 2010 on HBO’s Boxing After Dark. It is also the first time I have seen him in action and I must say that I am very impressed!!!

Khan is a 23 year old British Superstar of Pakistani descent whose promotion company ”Khan Promotions” signed up with “Golden Boy Promotions” to promote and give Khan maximum US exposure and in his most recent fight against Paulie Malinaggi which had Khan defending his WBA Light Welterweight title was an exciting introduction to US fans. He got a 12 round unanimous decision which he richly deserved. Paulie whom I like and who is a pretty talented fighter as far as boxing skills go but has no real punching power was totally outclassed and definitely looked like he had been in a fight.

Khan rise to fame came when he was Britain’s only representative in boxing in the 2004 Athens Olympics winning a Silver Medal at age 17 and went on to turn pro in 2005.

While Khan made a great first outing and I have definitely become a fan because there is nothing like an exciting, new, young prospect however, I’m waiting to see a fight where he takes on someone who can be a more competitive opponent. He’s a focused very relaxed fighter and on first fight appearances seems to be able to adapt to his opponent.

Out of the 3 final candidates are you really surprised at who won? I didn’t like any of the final 3 but since someone did have to win Sandra was the lesser of the 3 evils. Russell although winning the Sprint player of the year 2 seasons in a row and walking away with $100,000.00 each time I feel has nothing to complain about but I think he really took this 2nd loss hard because he gave the impression at the reunion of having tossed a few back. He was quite talkative and was slurring his speech.

It was nice to see Boston Rob again who has a beautiful daughter who looks just like her daddy. Boston Rob feels he and Russell if they could have worked together would have done well but the problem with Russell is he plays to get to the end while Boston Rob plays to win, meaning Russell loses sight of the fact that the people he double crosses will be on the jury so you should strategize well but maintain the social aspects of the game. I tend to agree. See you next season when Survivor goes to Nicaragua!

I find it offensive when I hear supposedly intelligent people say stupid things. People that are gay are for the most part born that way. They do not wake up one day and decide to be gay. They may wake up one day and REALIZE they are gay or they make wake up and ACKNOWLEDGE that they are gay or they make up one day and decide to ANNOUNCE that they are gay, but the fact that they are gay has always been there.

Since this is no more a choice for them than to be born black, physically handicapped or for that matter mentally handicapped we should be more accepting as a society. I'm not so much concerned for adults because I feel they have lived long enough and matured enough to know how to deal with the world dishes out and can even fight back and this may be naivete on my part but I I am concerned for teenagers especially in smalltown rural communities where people tend to be rather homophobic, anti-gay and unforgiving, as if teenagers don't have it tough already growing up. Also, they may not get the support needed from the people that matter most, their families.

I see so many people on the television news these days that find themselves publicly accused of being gay because they slept with someone of the same sex. That does not make you gay. People sleep with someone of the same sex for many different reasons. If you were just curious and it's a one time thing I think you're about as heterosexual as they come. Lots of people experiment at least once in their lifetime. If it is something you've tried and you like it and know that you'll do it again but you're not making a partner type change at best you are BISEXUAL, meaning you like to swing both ways abd there is nothing wrong with that if that is your thing. People should just stop being so quick to label people when you really don't know what you're talking about.

...and on a final note gay men or even women can get married and have babies and still be gay. They may be in denial or they may just be making a choice.

Candice Eliminated 1st Danielle Eliminated 2nd

This week on survivor not only was I pleased with the blind sides but I found myself actually rooting for Rupert and Colby to pull off the big upset and stay in the game and I was pleased as punch when they made it happen.

The war is on between Parvati and Russell and as much as I love to hate Russell (I really like Russell because my opinion is that in real life he is a really sweet down to earth guy but he good at this game) I’m behind him 100%. I’ve never liked Parvati because she thinks that shitty little smile will get her through.

How pathetic was Danielle. It’s bad enough she let her mouth overload her ass but then she cried about it. Regardless of how it turns out don’t show weakness, it makes you look like you didn’t know what you were doing. I can’t figure out whose been the biggest fence straddler, Jerri or Sandra but it’s time for them to go.

On a final note. We got the boys pitted against the girls and I’m rooting for the boys. Now I don’t see Russell taking either Colby or Rupert to the final 3 (he’s just pissed right now) because I think he would lose based on the likeability factor but things sure are interesting right now and I can’t wait for next week to see who gets their scramble on.

This was an amazing week on Idol. Last year on Idol they had Sinatra week and since I do not listen to Sinatra music I figured this week will be boring so I will tape it. I did however watch it back the same night (unfortunately not early enough to vote)…who would I have voted for?…ok, you twisted my arm.Out of the remaining contestants Casey James, Lee Dewyze and Aaron Kelly have been favorites since auditions. I still like Casey but I’m over him and while I love Aaron’s voice I don’t think he’s ready yet (nevertheless I was sad to see him go) but I would have voted for him anyway and I would have without a doubt voted for Lee because he too has an amazing voice but also star potential. I could see me running out and buying his album the minute it becomes available. So ok, you’ve guessed I want Lee to win the title of American Idol. My son once pointed out to me that on the night that someone gets sent home they sing better than they did the night before and he’s right. I believe that if Aaron had sung the night before like he did on results night (because he was awesome) he would still be there!!!

Let me start with Harry Connick Jr, he like Adam Lambert a few weeks ago was an incredible mentor. The entire evening was so much fun. He was funny, charming, engaging, entertaining and he put all the contestants at ease. He went way beyond what he had to and I think it made all the difference. Everybody sang really well. Lee was the best of the evening. The biggest shocker for me this season was that Lee was so shy and introverted and it was really nice to see him relax and come alive on stage. I think he’s is finally starting to believe in his self and if he can remain outside the box I believe that he can win this. All that believe with me make sure you vote for Lee.

On a final note: results night for me is just that. Sometimes they have good entertainment, sometimes not. I wasn’t at all impressed by the talent this week but I was impressed with the quality of songs sang by the idol contestants especially the Harry Connick Jr medley.

I am like a kid in a candy store when it comes to things I like and one of the things I like on Monday nights is Dancing with the Stars! It was another awesome night of dancing! Evan besides being very sexy when he dances was on point getting the first perfect score of the season with a 30 for his Argentine Tango with Nicole and Derek holding down the number 2 spot as well they should be because they have been hot all season.

One of the highlights of the night was the Cha Cha Challenge where they separated into two teams of 3 couples each to gain extra points for the night. This gives low scoring couples a chance to gain extra points. My team of choice was Team Madonna because Evan is my choice to win the Mirror Ball Trophy but also because I adore Niecy and support her and Erin with random votes. I agree with the final scoring on the two teams although my team did not come out ahead. The judges were all in a good mood and a good time was had by all.

TEAM GAGA Chad & Cheryl Nicole & Derek Pamela & Damian

TEAM MADONNA Niecy & Louis Evan & Anna Erin & Max

How the candidates stack up for me and the order in which I think they should be eliminated:

* Chad Ochocinco
* Pamela Anderson
* Niecy Nash
* Erin Andrews
* Nicole Scherzinger
* Evan Lysacek (MIRROR BALL TROPHY WINNER)

I have been putting off this post but one more day of Maury Povich and girls having sex with several guys in the same span of time with no protection (what happened to practicing safe sex) I just can’t take it anymore. You can’t force a man (and I use this term loosely because usually the guy in question is barely over 21) to be a father. You cannot ask someone to be responsible for your child’s mental well-being who doesn’t want to be. It may not be fair but it’s life.

…does forced fatherhood work? It depends! There are all kinds of scenarios where a man or even a boy can step up to the plate and be a pretty decent father. It depends on his character. Sometimes a man doesn’t mind paying the child support but he don’t want the mental and emotional commitment of being there for the child. You may think your child needs a father but for me I think your child needs more than someone masquerading as daddy because he’s being shamed into it.

First, let me say that with the knowledge we have today versus what we had 20 or 30 years ago there should not be as many accidental pregnancies! Second, in that knowledge we should be more selective in who we have children with. Since both of these things are virtually ignored once you have proven that this man is your baby’s daddy put him on child support through the courts (even if you are a couple unless you are married) because when you break up and he has other things to do with his money but help take care of his child there will be consequences that will get him back on track.

Now in an ideal world he will take an interest in his child and be the ideal father whether you are together or not. He’ll have the child sometimes which will give you a break. He’ll give the child a male role model to look up to. Here’s the rub…all men don’t want this and if this is how they feel don’t force the issue, take the money and run and be both mommy and daddy to your child. Let your brother or father be a role model because if you make that man be in a situation he doesn’t want to be in it will just breed resentment and he may not be so nice to your child when you’re not around. The horror of what happens to some children when they are being taken care of by a father who is barely legal age himself. They are really just too young and immature for the role of a father. A lot of these men already bear resentment because they didn’t want a child and you have put them in an awkward position. Yes, it does take two to tango but ultimately it is your body. I would never leave it up to a man to ensure that I do not get pregnant. Also, a condom is not satisfactory birth control although a large percent of people don’t even suit up. If you’re in a relationship at some point you should have talked about pregnancy so that you know where his head is on the subject and what the consequences will be. …and come on ladies if a guy already has several kids and takes care of none of them why would you want to get pregnant by him. What makes you think your child will be different.

So forced fatherhood, I would be concerned that it was not in the best interest of my child emotionally and physically. Once you have taken on the role to be a mother don’t bitch and moan about how much work it is and that he’s not there for you. It is a lot of work but you should have known that and he has no obligation to be there for you, or to go to the doctor with you or to emotionally hold your hand. A girl at 16 can rise to the occasion and be a damned good mom, a 16year old boy can be a good dad if he chooses to be (not necessarily a good provider) but if he chooses not to be because most 16 year olds want to play video games and hang with their friends, a baby to him is a status symbol more than anything that says “Look what I did” but there is no real interest on his part. On the other hand 25 year old men don’t want to have fatherhood forced on them when they don’t even like you half the time. They just wanted to get in your pants. Ladies be careful with your children.

I raised two children by myself. If I look back do I have regrets. Hell No! and if I had it to do again I would do it the same way. I’m proud of how my children turned out and they didn’t grow up with a step father beating them on a regular basis as me and my brothers grew up. I have a son by my ex husband who was kind of out of sight out of mind. A good father when we were married but once we were no longer together and lived in different states although he paid child support he didn’t stay in touch and a daughter whose father basically said to me “How do I know it’s mine”. In her lifetime he sent $40 once and acknowledged (because she looks just like him) that it was his child. I could have forced the issue and got my child support but it was a different time and era and I was a pretty strong woman even at 18 so I pretty much said to hell with him. I relished the idea that there weren’t all the outside influences telling me what I should and should not do with regard to my children. I relished the idea that there was no one wanting to take my kids from me on the weekends or in the summer so that I would spend all this time worrying about them. I relished life drama free with no emotional upheavals for my children.. Did my kids want heir dad in their life? I found out when they were teens they did. I sent my son off to his dads for the summer at 15. It was good for them both. By the way my ex paid child support until my son was 15. I didn’t pursue it. I had to go through a little more trouble to find my daughter’s father. We were never a couple. We had a one week affair that didn’t work out. I knew his name and where he came from. Through the power of the internet I located him. He spoke to her on the phone once for about 30 minutes and that was the end of that. I don’t know what was said between the two of them and I never asked. I didn’t have and didn’t want to have any more children not because I couldn’t but because I thought 2 was enough. There were some hard times when they were growing up but we made it through. You don’t have to have a multitude of children just because your body allows you to.

So bottom line, forced fatherhood, I am against it. Some men give them time and they will come around, others your child is probably better off with just you! One last thing ladies, remember we mature a lot faster than guys so we have to ultimately be responsible for our own well-being and that includes what happens in and around her bodies. Nothing has changed in the last 20-30 years, a large majority of men will tell you what you need to hear to get what they want and when things are good hey! everybody's happy but let a child come into play and sometime men feel backed into a corner and then it is not so good anymore and this is where feelings get hurt. Best thing to do is avoid the situation all together by practicing safe, safe sex.

Not really! Did I cry? You bet!

I’m unlike many people that are dying to watch certain movies and tend to get around to it like pretty quick! It takes me a little longer. I also find that I steer clear of movies that have a lot of hype behind them. I feel they are over-rated! Case in point, it was 6 years after the fact before I saw “The Color Purple”, didn’t even know what it was about but everybody seemed to be shocked that I had not seen it until I did and I gave the movie a 5 star rating.

Good Will Hunting on the other hand I give it 4.75 rating because while it was an excellent movie the actors in the movie were just coming into their own so over the years since then their acting abilities have improved. I adore Matt Damon so I am glad that I did not see this movie until now because I spent the better half of the movie disliking him a lot. I thought he was a jerk but I was totally happy with the ending and all the parts in between that made me cry. Now I can tell all the people who told me that this was a really good movie and that I should see it that I finally have!